It may be a dream afraid of waking up, or it may be a dream coming to realization in the next morning.

Monday, July 26, 2010

Peter Pan's Also Growing Up

When we talk about development, sometimes we talk about either the development in us is either abrupt or subtle. We can notice what we have been experiencing, like the growth of mustache, maturity on voice, or most clearly, puberty. And some other aspects of development, we just have to take a while, in order to realize that we're experiencing them.

One of them is wisdom. Wisdom is considered as one of the liquid development of human beings, liquid as in it's constantly changing and developing, upwardly or downwardly. Your whole life you may find yourself being like a complete idiot, not knowing what's best for you and others, making the wrong decisions, and saying the terrible things to others.

I believed that I am a late bloomer, or worse, what they call Peter Pan Syndrome when an adult is stuck inside, waiting for us to just have the guts to get a hoe and dig all that sands that blocks our development. It takes years for me to just head out and feel like an adult. Well, it takes enrolling in a Masters program for to feel like an adult! But all this while, I never felt that wisdom has been liquidizing in my mind (lame!) and no, seriously, I just find myself growing up, wisdom-wise.

My point is, you're an intelligent being, I believe every individual is an intelligent being. When you're experiencing your experience, your mind records what happens and if mistakes happen, your mind will unconsciously record them and teach you that the mistakes aren't supposed to be repeated. You just let the nature takes its course, and don't feel bad because if you think Peter Pan's not growing up, think again. He also learns from his experience.

Sunday, July 18, 2010

Six Degrees

Stanley Milgram, the psychologist who did the obedience experiment, who shocked the world by finding that people's readiness to kill others due to authority is higher than expected, also conducted an experiment that everyone in this world is connected to each other via at least other six individuals. He named his theory Small World Phenomenon. To make it simple, you want to connect a certain Fredo Prego (names are totally fictional) and you might know Ali who knows Fatimah, who knows George, who knows Derek, who knows Stephanie, who knows Crystal, who finally, knows Fredo Prego. So, it means there are a distance of 6 persons between you and Fredo Prego.

To detail it out, you might know Ali who studies in the same college with you, Ali knows Fatimah who is his sister, Fatimah knows George who is Fatimah's friend when she was an exchange student at the US, George knows Derek, who is his childhood friend, Derek knows Stephanie who works at a certain publishing company, Stephanie knows Crystal, who is her husband's sister, and finally Crystal knows Fredo Prego who is Crystal's boss in her workplace.

Look at this map...

The implication of this is how small the world is, and if you pay a deal of concentration and effort, you can actually get connected to almost anyone in this world. Do the experiment yourself. If you have a facebook, try to find any name that is quite alien in your life. Try to click on one of his or her friends, then one of the friends of his or her friends, chances are you might just stumble upon a person who you actually know. Try it several times and see what the average number of people who connect you and the person in the beginning point.

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

No Youtube!

I guess this is why it is an APEX university...

This is 'it' trying to load...

...and this is 'it' finally just couldn't...

There goes my internet life...

Thursday, July 8, 2010


I've settled down and now I'm comfortable with the fact that I'm staying and studying in USM. Although the impression that I'd like to give was my decision was the right one, but I couldn't help but to feel scared, fearful about this whole thing. Really scared. The first moment I set my foot on USM, I already felt like things were going to be hard. Taking the course I'm not interested in, being in an unfamiliar place and blending in quite a remote environment, I never thought I'd end, even eventually, being an adult.

Finally, it took my mother's call to make me realize what I should be feeling instead of fear. My mother told me how she kept thinking about me and finally one of her own children actually moved out of the house, of the place, of the "safety zone," in a sense that shows I'm achieving something. She couldn't be prouder, and you know what, I shouldn't be too. It takes gut, as Wilhelmina said to Betty when the latter decided to quit her job at Mode, to do that. It takes gut to move out, live independently and start your journey as a full-time adult, not leeching off your parents.

So, from now on, I not just have to to train myself to be good in the field of Social Work, I also have to work very hard to succeed as an adult, because well, I'm an adult now.

Tuesday, July 6, 2010


Just want to say, USM is much better than I initially thought. The people here are very friendly and they are helpful. My classes will start on Monday next week which is on 12th  July. It's going to be a subject I'm not really interested in but who knows what's going to happen in the future. I'll try my best and I really hope you readers will take some time to pray for my success in this place.

Oh, by the way, I'm residing in a one-person room so I am very so happy! Since when I was studying in IIUM, I had been dreaming to stay alone, because it's much easier. And now it feels so calm and relaxed. Hope it stays this way.

That's it my random thought for today. :)