Definition of Friendship

Recently I had a discussion with one of my colleagues and how he was dissatisfied with current situation of friendships in his life. He is not Malaysian, so it is logical for him to be a foreigner here and to expect closer relationship with people of the same nationality in here. But, instead, he felt like he was alone here and that he did not really maintain close friendship with the people of his nationality. The reason why he felt so was that whenever he ever needed a friend, his friend would always be busy.

So, I asked him what his definition of friendship was. For him, to be together, and to eat together, to hang out together, that is not his definition of friendship because everyone could do that. His definition of friendship entails being there for him whenever he is struck with real life problem such as a death of a family, or a difficulty in struggling in Malaysia.

I guess his definition of friendship is quite different than mine. I wrote an entry before, titled "Little Friendship" and I argued that to have a meaningful friendship with someone, we rarely need dramatic event to give us the realization of who our real friends are. The little things are always enough - remembering to invite this one person for lunch, saying "hi" followed with a personal greeting or a sincere "how are you doing" in FB, or anything that makes us feel appreciated and that someone actually remembers us.

Of course this is not the sole factor, but I believe the little things are often the starter to a more meaningful friendship because the little things provide the "comfort platform" for you to be more open and personal in your friendship. That is my definition of friendship.